Anyway, on the way up to visit my mom's this past Monday I was dumbstruck by JM's podcast. Call it my ah ha moment or whatever you want to call it. I'd like to think of it as a smack upside the head. Go here and or iTunes and listen to the 3/24/12 podcast.
Let's call it "control when you are out of control". Bear with me here, i'll paraphrase. Or listen to the podcast if you can.
Taking control. Regain your sense of control and ease the feeling of utter helplessness by being proactive in other areas of your life. Keep yourself busy with other things. Be positive and have an impact. Exert control in other areas of your life and if you can have a positive impact on others.I cannot control the situation with my mom. I can be proactive and control what I eat and my exercise. I can clean my act up and get off this pity food wagon I have been on for far too long. I can give mom the Gift I know deep in my heart I want to give. I will keep myself busy with weight loss, exercise and fixing my home. I can continue the work with my weight loss group and maybe have a positive impact on others.
I called my hubby later in the day and mentioned my ah ha moment. He said "that's what I have been telling you". My response was that I needed to have my pity party, now I am done.
The damage of the last few weeks is bad. As of this morning my weigh is 202.4. No too bad but 5 pounds over my lowest for 2012 of 197. I have huge plans for the next 3 weeks to tackle this weight. It will be a rough few weeks - no sugar, no bread. - but I am ready. It's only 21 days starting Monday. It's a fat loss program my trainer is running.