Friday, October 28, 2011

5? Fri 10/28/11

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1. Do you prefer cotton, silk, or flannel sheets?
Neither.  Well I guess Cotton.  But Beech cotton.  So silky smooth.  You can get them at Bed Barth and Beyond.  Love them but I only have 1 set.

2. What time zone are you in?
Pacific.

3. What is your favorite part of the holiday season?
Gathering of families, slowing down to spend time together, school break and cooler weather.

4. What is your favorite "wintry" drink? (It doesn't have to be an "alcoholic" drink!)
Confession time.  Dam Starbucks.  I am in love with the Salted Caramel Frap or Hot Chocolate.  Yummy.  Salt, chocolate, caramel and whip cream how can you go wrong.  I had one a few days ago and said goodbye.  Way too many wasted calories.

5. In your opinion, what is the worst job in the world?
I don’t know I am sure there is 1000’s of crap ass jobs out there.  Anything shown on Dirty Jobs.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I Feel Pretty

Today I finished Week 1 Day 2 of the couch to 10k program.  Afterwards I went home and showered.  I felt great, a high of sorts.  Hours later I am feeling a bit lower but I had heavy carbs today so who knows the real reason.

Even through 12 weeks is a long time, I am excited to finish the program.  The last 2 days I wanted to run more.

TMI WARNING
Now the I am running / walking  more distance I have a reoccurring issue.  I could use some ideas here..  The problem is I get sweaty on my low back, which ends going down my rear.  Gross I know.  Well It is making my lower parts uncomfortable, lets leave it at that,  and I don’t like the feeling.

Right now I wear normal cotton undies with mostly cotton shorts or capris.  Someone suggested higher end running pants (wicking) with no undies.  I feel like I will have the same problem.  Is there wicking underwear out there?

I will update my weight on Thursday!

Monday, October 24, 2011

Help From a Friend

I have a new friend.  This friend makes me feel like a big girl.  I am excited about all the cool things this new friend and I will be doing.

Meet my new friend, isn’t she pretty:

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My old dinosaur phone went extinct this past week.  The flip part of the phone detached itself.  It was DEAD.  Lost all my contacts.  Boo!  After a ton of research, adjustment of bills and finagling I convinced hubby that a smart phone is the right choice for me and we can afford it.  I had to switch my landline to Verizon (from cable) at a savings of $22 per month.  This allied me to get a new phone even though my renew date was 12.17.11.  Fun part was I spent 2 hours in the Verizon store with the toddler.

After much internal debate, I am good at that, I decided to start the couch to 10K program using my new friend.  The program is 12 weeks so I will be done just before the half marathon on 1.29.12.  The program is 3 days a week.  On my off days I will do a kettlebell routine at least 2 times and I want need to get back into Yoga.

I loaded up my C210K app, Runkeeper app and some tunes.  I am hoping and ready to go.

Oh course and as always in my life, there is a big chink in today’s plans.  Plan was to start day 1 after school drop off using the jogging stroller for the toddler.  Well, big kid is home sick.  Alternate plan – use the treadmill when toddler naps.  Flexibility is key.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

A Direct Relationship

My utter lack of blog writing and reading has a direct relationship to my lack of effort with my journey.  Denial may be a long river but sometimes it can be an easy river to navigate.  On the other hand I have been busy.  Steadily busy.  Although am I making myself busy in order to swim in Denial again?

My weight is roughly 199, same place it been for a long time.  I have seen the wrong side of 200 way to many times for comfort.  I did drop down to 196 with a 4 day show of excellence with my diet.  As for my October goals  - I had a week where I was slipping; eating later, forgetting my meds / vits and not getting enough water but most of the month I have been on track.  Except with the weight goal oh course.

My training - I am taking a break from formal kettlebell classes for multiple reasons.  I have a kettlebell at home but it still sitting in the same place.  I have been focusing on the walk/ run training for my half marathon in January.  I have been training with a friend, same person who is joining me in the race.  Problem is that when she flakes, I flake.  Wrong idea.  There is no reason why I can’t go on without her.  I have always been easily influenced by others.

I have been in the excuse mode of weight loss.  I am telling you know it is absolutely the wrong place to be and if you ever find yourself here – GET OUT!!!!  For example my head thinks – today I have a potluck so I CAN”T eat right today, why bother.  WRIONG WRONG WRONG. 

Monday, October 17, 2011

Still Here

Sorry to all.  I took an unintentional break.

Last week I did great, then came Friday.  All hell broke lose and the 4 pounds I lost in the 4 days before came right back on in the next 3 days.

My mom came down for a last minute trip.  It was awesome to see her but it included going out (I love) and food (love too).  I didn’t make the right choices.

More later, still have company.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

No Weigh In Today–Fresh Start

I know my weight.  I did step on the scale.  I am choosing not to post it here.  Not because I want to hide it.  It is because it hasn’t changed or budged for that matter in over a week.  I am not going to post it because I haven’t done a dam thing about it in far too long.  Why show a loss number when you did nothing to work on it.

I am turning over a drastic leaf today.  Cleaning out the system.  I started Cooler 1 from Tosca Reno’s Eat Clean Diet.  Basically it’s no sugar and low carb.  This is me this week

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Today hasn’t been as bad as I thought it would be.  I did get hungry but it passed.  I had a woozy episode but I ate 1/2 an apple and it passed.  Overall I feel clear.  I even created a new yummy treat.

Tea Slushy
heavily brewed flavored tea *
crushed ice
chocolate whey protein

Blend and enjoy!
* I choose Aztec Fire by Teavana – yummy

What do you do as a reset?  Restart?

Sunday, October 9, 2011

First OA Meeting

On Friday I attended my first OA (Overeaters Anonymous) meeting.  The location I attended also includes a H.O.W section.

It hard to put to words how I felt it the meeting so bear with me.  I don’t think a H.O.W OA meeting is the right thing for me.  The H.O.W has you eat no sugar, no white flour and only portion controlled meats and veggies and specific times for 30 days and then slowly add in good grains overtime.  This is not for me.  I know how to eat right, I need to discover why I choose not to eat right and specific times I eat compulsively (stress, sad, social, etc).

Most of the people there were 20 years or more my senior.  There was only 2 somewhere near my age.  As much as age should not be an issue, it doesn’t give me a sense of comrade or the feeling someone knows where I am coming from (maybe 20 year ago they did).  On the other hand ladies were kind and invited me to lunch (El Pollo Loco).

Most of the meeting was just reading from books or papers.  No actions.

I didn’t walk away with “oh, this is where I start” feeling.  I didn’t walk away with any take home message.  I really didn’t walk away with much except an envelope with some welcome stuff in it.

Next week I am going to try a different time and location.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Some Relief

I am finally feeling some relief. Last night was back to school night.  I am feeling more confidence in my son’s teacher.  I was so stressed out about it the past 2 weeks.  Stressed to the point of anger and tears.  The teacher appears to be reaching her groove and is displaying a slight bit more confidence.  We are not out of the woods.

I will be breaking a rule I set for myself.  The teacher needs help.  She is asking for volunteers.  Honestly she needs volunteers.  I plan want need to volunteer.  I know I am not the great and all powerful OZ but I would like to help out and keep an eye on things in the classroom.  This same thing happened in kindergarten.  His kinder teacher was frazzled, lacking confidence and turned to me and a few other moms for help.  The teacher last night reminded me of the kinder teacher.  Plan is to talk to hubby before I commit.

My undiagnosed anxiety and probably depression is getting the best of me.  You can see if in my weight.  Hubby can see it in my face and manners.  I can see it in my utter lack of enjoyment.

Exercise provides relief to my mental issues but it is only a temporary fix.  I need more help.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 10.4.11

Weight = 200.6
Loss Gain = +1.4

It’s not pretty.  It’s not where I ever expected to be again.  It pisses me off.

I am wordless today.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

October 2011 Goals

Bringing back an old motivator, monthly goal setting.  I have been lacking in so many areas of life that I think some goal setting will help set me in the right direction.

Goal #1
Weight at 194
As of today that would be minus 6 pounds.  Yes, in case you are wondering my weight has been hovering around 200.  Gross.

Goal #2
Water, Water, Water
Minimum of 72 ounces of water daily.  This past week at Disney and the fair I could feel my alck of water.  I didn’t carry around a bottle and I was so thirsty.  When the weather cool it get harder but then I can break into drinking unsweetened decaf teas.

Goal #3
Eat within 1 hour of waking
I have been waiting too long to eat, sometimes 3 hours or more, exception is my am tea.  Bad idea for someone with insulin resistance.  Actually bad idea for anyone.

Goal #4
Attend OA

Attend first and possibly a second OA meeting.

Today is weird.  I had a decent night’s sleep and it the first day we have nothing and nowhere to go.  I am so tired.  Insanely tired.  Can’t think straight tired.  Why the hell am I so dang tired.

What are your October Goals?

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Give Me 3 B’s

I am beat, broke and in need of doing some serious butt kissing of the hubby.  Along with the normal household, car schlepping and life stuff here is my week:
M – 2.5 mile walk, hubby worked really late, can’t remember rest

T- Help with fundraiser at school for 3 hours while hubby watched toddler, Disneyland with both kids 12p till 9pm, tons of walking.

W – Toddler music class, hubby worked OT in the afternoon.  Right after he got home at 9pm I went out to a friend’s house.

Th – Bootcamp, LA county fair with big kid (no school) from 1 to 10pm (so much walking) while hubby watched 2 yo, cleaned and folded all the clothes I washed on Sun.  Big time butt kissing, he never does folding anymore.  Fair is so $$$, games are $5 or more.  Rides even more.

F – Hubby worked, mom club meeting in am, clean up house, go to Disneyland with mom’s only in afternoon until 12:30 am, tons of walking.  Kids were watched by sitter until hubby came home.

S – Kettlebells for 1 1/2 hours – ouch, park birthday party full of sugar, soccer game all with 2 very overtired, no napped kids.  Toddler lost his marbles at the game, laying on asphalt of parking lot lost his marbles.

I am SO tired right now but I still have at least 4 more hours until I have a semi break.  We are home for the night, thank goodness. Toddler has calmed some but is so tired.  Now I just have to keep him out of trouble until bedtime.