This was originally posted on March 26th, 2010. It’s interesting to me. When I was heavier (long before the blog) I was happily swimming down the "NIAL”. Right now I am struggling, the weight is sticking, its taking an enormous effort to do anything. I can see how easy, so dam easy, it would be to slip back into old habits, gain weight and just ignore it all. I’ve been fooling myself into thinking I am not fat. The reality is that I still am. Sure I am fitter, stronger but I still have a way to go and so much to learn.
The other day at friend in the weight competition said its easier to be fat. Ok I will agree there is some easiness to being fat. But is it really easier. Do you feel good, can you do all that you want, or is it really just a really large form of denial. Forgetting the 800 lb gorilla in the room does not make it go away. Fooling yourself when you look in the mirror. “I’m not that fat”. “I am fit.” “I am happy where I am” I think if you take the weight loss thing slow and steady, learn constantly it will become part of your life. You will learn to love new foods that are good for you. You will want to exercise. I love my hippie oatmeal – Coach’s oats, Vanilla J. Robb protein, Flax meal, bee pollen and sometimes blueberries.
I am looking for a happy medium. I want a much lower stable weight, like the 150s or so but I don’t want to be nutty about how I eat. I want exercise to be part of me, a no brainer and I want my weight under control. If I want a piece of cheesecake on a rare occasion it won’t be total deviation to me.