Thursday, June 30, 2011

Chop My Head Off

The other night I mentioned to my Trainer my shared goal of 175.  Both hubby and I want to reach 175 before we leave to visit family in FL.  We take off on August 24.

Trainer Paul said “I’ll chop your head off if you don’t reach 175 by then”.  To be honest Paul mumbles, don't’ all men, so I couldn’t at first understand his comment.  I thought he was saying it’s too lofty to drop that much weight but alas no.  He was saying He will cut my head off if I don’t make 175 by then.  There is no reason why I can’t be 175 by then.

Really?

I’ve been a pillar of good weight loss examples these past few months.  I will really have to kick it in high gear to make that goal.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Sit Ups

I’ve mentioned before my serious lack of ability when it comes to sit ups.  I am talking full range of motion sit ups.  This is not a new thing.  I couldn’t do them when I was a kid, a soccer player for 12 years or as an adult in an exercise class.

Monday night I asked my trainer to work with me on learning how to fire the muscles correctly.  We tried putting my feet in the kettlebell handle for support.  No luck.  It only worked with him standing on my feet.  Homework - do this on my couch.

Today at early am boot camp I was doing the wimpy sit ups (lifting shoulders only).  We tried the bell feet again, Nope.  Then he offered his fingers.  That worked.  Problem is that my internal system was getting a bit backed up and a fluff happened.  It was fairly quiet but he probably heard it and smelled it.  I just kept going but was internally embarrassed.  He left me to my leg lifts.

Then my friend came over.  My very fit friend.  Her advice was to swing my arms more.  She decided to hold my feet.  Please No.  Luckily my system stayed intact and she wasn’t there long.

I was a bit self conscious about needed all the attention for my sit ups.  Seriously why the hell can’t I do them?  Practice time.

That’s my embarrassing exercise moment, yours?

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 6/28/11

Weight = 191.8
Loss = –1.6

I thanked the scale today.  I am feeling great.  I went to kettlebells last night, fist time in a week.  Ouch but good.

Yesterday I did no bread and guess what?  It was fine I didn’t keel over.

Sorry such a quick post.  Busy summer happening here.

Monday, June 27, 2011

A Willing Partner

In case you haven’t noticed using words and writing are not my strongpoint, never has been, I am math and science girl.  I have a bachlors in Chemistry to prove it :-)  I have tried to convey how much my husband rocks.  Maybe this will help.

The other night, after being gone all day and night at Disneyland with the big kid while hubby stayed home with the 2 year old, we had an awesome discussion.  It started with “I read your blog”.  He is not a regular reader.  For awhile he did and occasionally I would send him a post I think he should read.  It’s been a long time.  He said he read many posts.

His first comment was that he doesn’t want me to stress about the house.  Um ok, but how.  I am here all the time.  I am constantly working on keeping it up unless I am in my “give up” moods and its too much.  When there is too much to do, too many places that need work I get overwhelmed and give up.  Not the best quality, I know.

He also thinks where he has been in his fit journey is affecting me.  Background – He started Kettlebell training the same time I did (Dec 2010).  We were consistent and enjoyed it.  He was also working on dropping some weight and making good food choices.  He is not obese at all, just a bit thick.  He is about 5’6” and maybe maxes at 190 pounds.  His motivation for getting fitter was related to making a marker for a career related thing.  I won’t give the details, they are not mine to give out.  He didn’t make the mark and he essentially stopped all forward progress on weight and fitness around March, and gained weight.  My opinion is his lack has nothing to do with my current lack (and gain).  I could be wrong and maybe deep down there is something to what he is saying.  He is not a saboteur and brings home pies or something like that.  He is just not doing anything for himself.  He said lets hit 175 when we leave for Florida in August (8/24).  The we part is since we both weigh about the same, sucky I know.

His last comment was “no more chocolate covered anything in the house”.  We’ve been buying covered almonds and cashews.  Yummy but he is right, they have to GO.

We need to talk more about his comments.  It was past midnight and we both passed out quickly.  Espiecially about the 175 and the HOW.

Is your partner willing or unwilling and how does that affect your journey?

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Easier to be Fat? - Repost

This was originally posted on March 26th, 2010.  It’s interesting to me.  When I was heavier (long before the blog) I was happily swimming down the "NIAL”.  Right now I am struggling, the weight is sticking, its taking an enormous effort to do anything.  I can see how easy, so dam easy, it would be to slip back into old habits, gain weight and just ignore it all.  I’ve been fooling myself into thinking I am not fat.  The reality is that I still am.  Sure I am fitter, stronger but I still have a way to go and so much to learn.

The other day at friend in the weight competition said its easier to be fat. Ok I will agree there is some easiness to being fat. But is it really easier. Do you feel good, can you do all that you want, or is it really just a really large form of denial. Forgetting the 800 lb gorilla in the room does not make it go away. Fooling yourself when you look in the mirror. “I’m not that fat”. “I am fit.” “I am happy where I am” I think if you take the weight loss thing slow and steady, learn constantly it will become part of your life. You will learn to love new foods that are good for you. You will want to exercise. I love my hippie oatmeal – Coach’s oats, Vanilla J. Robb protein, Flax meal, bee pollen and sometimes blueberries.

I am looking for a happy medium. I want a much lower stable weight, like the 150s or so but I don’t want to be nutty about how I eat. I want exercise to be part of me, a no brainer and I want my weight under control. If I want a piece of cheesecake on a rare occasion it won’t be total deviation to me.

Friday, June 24, 2011

5? Fri 6/24/11 and Then Some

1. What is your current favorite TV show?
I hate picking favorites.  I enjoy so much in life that I have a hard time saying this is the one.  That being said, I really enjoy the darker grittier shows like Dexter, Weeds, Rescue Me, Big Love.  Unfortunately, most of these I watch by myself.  Hubby and I enjoy In Plain Sight, Burn Notice, Justified, Royal Pains, etc.

2. What's the worst haircut you ever got?
Probably any cut between the ages of 5 and 14.  Love my parents but they didn’t make the best choices for me or teach me the same when it came to hair and clothes.  They tried.  The ones below are not the worst examples.  I had the bowl, boy cut for sometime.  I was well into my 20’s and even 30’s when I really was able to use my assets correctly.

image0000147A image0000152A

3. What was something that you did as a child that you thought you were so cool for doing?
I probably thought I was super cool with the perm, frosted pink lipstick and blue eye shadow above.

4. Do you have any GREAT frugal family fun tips?
We are fortunate to live in an area with access to free stuff.  We have a pool down the street.  A beach pool (surrounded by sand) about a mile away.  Beautiful playgrounds.  Hiking trails and a nature area outside of our neighborhood, etc.  With a mild climate being outdoors is possible nearly year round.  As an example the 2 big boys are fishing at the man made lake and exercise path that is about a mile away.  No actual tips, just spend time together.

5. Would you drive across country if you had the money to fly?
If I had older kids and unlimited time and money, sure.  I would stop at cool locations, stay in nice places and explore.  We considered driving for a trip from CA to FL.  Luckily hubby changed his mind and bought plane tickets.

*********************************************************************************************************
Sorry I’ve been MIA the past few days.  Busy with a capitol B.  Mon – Disneyland with the 2 year old for half the day, lunch with hubby, kettlebells among the other stuff.  Tue – last day of school and big trip to Disney with 7 year old, fun.  We have passes but are blocked for the summer.  We went to celebrate the end of first grade.  Wed – errand day and annual OB* visit.  Thur – Legoland trip with big kid.  Today – crash.

* OB – we discussed doing this (click here) to help with the insanity of my TOM.  Crossing my fingers that the insurance will cover it.  Friends who have done it are so so happy with the outcome.

Sleep deprived here, again – my toddler came down with a virus.  He has been spiking fevers the past 2 days, etc.  Hubby rocks, he watched him all day and took him to the Dr.  We thought is was an ear infection.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 6/21/11

Weight = 193.4
Loss Gain = +2.4

There is no hormonal excuse for this.  I am pissed and frustrated.   I hate this extra weight.  I know I am not doing 110% and that pisses me off too.  This is not me (pic).

niceBut apparently it is since it was taken yesterday and posted on FB.  The person tagged me in the photo and I untagged myself.  I don’t want to be associated with that pic.  It doesn’t feel like me at all.  I hate my stomach, HATE.  This week I will post a bathing suit pics.  My legs are tiny for a 190+ pound women.  Why does it all have to be in the stomach.

I am pissed that I will probably not make my June goal.  Why the Frick am I doing this to myself.

I feel like a fraud to all my readers.  Please have faith in me, I will overcome this and move past.  So much more to say but I have to stop.   Busy day, busy week.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Why am I Defined by My Weight

The other day I was at the park with the boys.  The toddler ran off to a different area a second time.  For a second or so I wasn’t sure where he was.  I realized he had gone to this other area, sort of out of sight.  He was there for a few mins on his own.  As I was passing a few moms in the other area I heard one say “the big girl ….”  I didn’t hear the rest.  I couldn’t be 100% sure it was about me, but I am sure.  I am sure because he is little and I sure because they were probably asking why in the hell would a mom let a kid that young wander that far.

Let’s be honest you know in their heads the were think Fat, obese, disgusting, out of shape girl.  Why is that how I am described?  Why is that ok?  Why can I be the blonde lady in the black shirt.  Or the mom with the nice legs.

The crazy thing is I know I am fat but also have a much higher level of fitness than many of my thinner counterparts.  I know they can’t do what I do with a kettlebell or have the endurance to do a kettlebell class and a kickboxing class in the same night.  I am still exercising the same, if not more but I am feeling very fat and gross right now.  The extra pounds I gained back are killing me.

I am dealing with a few mental issues right now.  Some have worked out, others are in progress.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

To My ….

Happy fathers day to my …..

Best friend, confidant, snuggler, rock, sarcasm partner, provider…..

I wish I had time to write more about my husband but I don’t.  I many time forget how capable he is as a man, husband and dad. We have a big week here and I need to clean the house and be the play date entertainer for my 7 y.o. 

My love goes out to the man who made me possible.  We may not have the best relationship or be able to converse, I want you to know you did a great job and I love you.

Side note:  Scary scale numbers have been spotted.  Working my butt off to see a positive scale on Tuesday. 

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Bread Addict – repost

This post is from February 3, 2010.  My A1c is much lower now, thanks to hard work and a loss of 20 pounds or so.  I still have issues with bread.  I still have a hard time going all day without a bread like product.

I have insulin resistance. There is no denying it. When I did the 3 hour glucose tolerance test (not pregnant) in June 2008 my 3 hour number was one point below diabetes. My last A1c was 5.8%, diabetes starts at 6.0%.

I have been working on menu items to tack on my fridge as a quick reference. So every meal I think of has a starchy carb in it. More specifically, BREAD. I am addicted to bread. Eggs with toast, Cottage cheese with English muffin, turkey sandwich, etc. A warm sourdough roll loaded with butter is a thing of beauty. Surprisingly I am not much of a pasta fan, bring on the garlic bread I say.

For a long time my house has only had whole wheat, high fiber bread in it. Like Milton’s, etc. I have also been trying to keep the carbs to 30g per meal. But right now I am trying to really kick start the weight loss and hit my goal of 200. In order to do that I am going to eliminate the bread for a few weeks. Lunch is the hardest to eliminate because I really do not like salads. I feel like I eat forever and never feel even slightly satisfied. I also like warm food. So far I have not had a 100% on track day, very close. With many aspects in my life, consistency is the issue.

Friday, June 17, 2011

5? Friday 6/17

th_w6r0jk

1. What is your favorite summer time activity?
Even though it’s a pain in the arse to drive there, park, drag all the crap, etc I LOVE going to the beach.  The ocean calms my soul.  The kids love it and it’s fun.

2. Do you have one laundry soap you stick to, or do you buy whatever's on sale?
I grew up on Tide and stuck with it for many years.  When I bought my He washer (front loader) I  switched to the Kirkland (Costco) environmentally friendly brand.  When it comes to cleaning products I am mostly brand loyal.

3. What is your favorite dinner to make in the summer?
Living in Southern California when don't have super extremes in weather.  I don’t switch up meals much just because it’s summer.  Sure there is some days where I wish I didn’t put the oven on.  I love to BBQ but we have been without one for years, I miss it.  Hopefully we will be getting one soon.

4. Do you have any talents?
Loaded question, talents where?  I could go so many ways with one but I will keep it clean.  I guess I am good scrapbooker.  I’m a mom so I consider myself multi talented, you have to be.

5. If you could instantly be an expert in something, what would it be? Why?
Child rearing.  The number one killer to my confidence is the “am I doing the right thing” question I ask myself all the time.  Just like weight loss, there is too many opinions our there on how to raise a child.  I hope I do it right and my boys come through on the other end.  I am scared sh*tless of drug abuse poor mental health of teens, etc.

************************************************************************************************************
It’s 7am on Friday morning.  I’ve been up since 4:45am.  I did kettlebell boot camp at 5am and a bit of kickboxing.  The boys are still sleeping.  Loving the peace and quiet but its time to rally the troops soon.  Thanks to my multi talented hubby I get to go scrapbooking with a girlfriend today.  Looking forward to it but as always I wish I prepared more beforehand.

I want to crawl back in bed.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Grrr……

It’s amazing what a few extra pounds (5 to 7) will do to your wardrobe.  All those pants, shirts and dresses I bought a few months back are too tight or too uncomfortable.  I was so frustrated last night I changed 3 times to find something to wear to a baseball event.  I slid back into a loose, big pair of shorts and a big shirt.   

Why the hell did I allow this weight to come on.  I’ve slipped into old habits – mental habits and eating habits.

I’m Scared.

I will overcome this and move forward with my weight loss.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Pills and Poppers

Do you supplement?  You know all those vitamins and things out there that you can take that may or may not help you.  Supplements, in a very very limited capacity, can be helpful to weight loss.  But there can be a negative side to it.

Here is my regimen for the day (with a brief reason), most of it is normal for a women approaching her 40’s (yuck!):

  • baby aspirin 81mg – cause I'm old and have the gene marker for clotting
  • Metformin 1500 mg – to control PCOS symptoms & insulin resistance
  • Vit D3 – keep colds away
  • Vit C – obvious
  • Daily Vit – organic whole food vitamin, not synthetic
  • Fish Oil *
  • CLA – Conjugated Linoleic Acid – recommendation by trainer to reduce belly fat.  Not sure if it’s working ;-)
  • Probiotic

* - My Endocrinologist (for PCOS) recommended 2000mg of a combo of EPA and DHA, you have to look at the label.  You either have to take a ton of pills or find a very very high potency.  Most market brands are way too low.  I would rather take less pills.  A friend mentioned it helps with recovery from her workouts.  It has increased my good cholesterol by 15 points and I think it’s making my hair thicker.

Recently my trainer recommended an energy drink for my dragging arse.  Not a Rockstar etc but a supplement that contains minerals, vitamins and amino acids.  Some days I am a slug, not because I don’t want to exercise, I just don’t have IT.  There is a caffeine version and and a caffeine free version.  Mind you I drink only water and tea.  Only 2 cups of my tea are caffeinated.  I have to be very careful with affine, one caffeinated drink in the afternoon can keep me up all night.  Yesterday my experience with the caffeine version was awesome and scary.

Why?  I slept in yesterday until about 7:30.  I needed it.  I was beat from my Monday workout, my weekend and my TOM.  I ate my breakfast, oatmeal with whey protein and ground flax meal (more supplements), had a cup of tea and showered.  I was dragging arse big time.  I was beat.  On my way to the park I drank the energy drink.  The rest of the day I felt good, awake and able to do tasks.  I wasn’t “high”, I just wasn’t the big slug.  It’s scary how good I felt.  I wouldn’t want to become addicted to the feeling, I mentioned this to my trainer.  He agrees and said you use it when you need the recovery and eventually you will get to a point you won’t need it. 

Do you supplement?

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 6/14/11

Weight = 191.0
Loss = +1.0

I was wrong last week when I expected to be in the 180’s.  The main reason is my TOM and that I wasn’t in control when it hit.  It came at the same time my toddler was suffering an ear infection = no sleep for mommy.  My weight was far worse the other day.  The scale was 194.  Yikes.

I’m working hard on staying focused.  We went to a frozen yogurt shop yesterday.  I ate nothing, my friend was surprised.  The first few days of bringing your calories under control SUCK.

School is out in a week.  The summer is well planned but includes lots being out of the house.  I need to hone up on my cooler packing skills.  Got to bring the good stuff with me to fight temptation.  We have 3 trips – one to my parents house (me and boys only), another to Laughlin again and the last to visit my hubby's parents in FL, in the middle of August.  More on that later.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Everything Fine or Always Stressful?

A fellow blogger (Need to Get Me Back) is having a rough week.  In her post there was a paragraph that stuck a cord with me.

Moral of the story is that it's easy to make good choices and be smart when everything is going fine. When things are going wrong, when it's stressful, when you are tested, that's when it's harder and you have to make a bigger effort to be mindful of your choices. And I don't have everything figured out.

My problem is I never feel like everything is going fine.  I feel like I’m always in a heightened state, stressful state and then I go to a completely exhausted state.  Here is what my morning has been so far, maybe it will provide some insight, it’s roughly 10am on Sunday morning:

Hubby up at 4:15am for work, asked me about his socks (in dryer), toddler up at 5:20am, wants milk, refuses to go back in his bed, we go to my bed and fall back asleep.  (pause in writing to – removed toddler from playing in sink, clean up cupcake mess (7yo), comfort toddler, warm up tea).  All up at 8am (that was awesome), kids go downstairs to play Wii, 7yo yells that the Wii is not working.  I mange to use the facilities and put something on.  Spend next 20 min trying to fix Wii (toddler broke it).  Meanwhile toddler finds card deck and spread it all over floor and spread a tube of sunscreen on floor and wall in other room.  Enter kitchen and attempt to make my tea, notice sunscreen and dead fish in tank*.  Clean up sunscreen, get kids breakfast, call hubby.  Create a temporary tank for the 2 remaining fish, fish them out, fish out dead fish.  Change poopie diaper and make more frozen waffle for kids (not great breakfast for them, I know, I’m trying), take out trash and recycles. (another pause to attend to yelling toddler who wants something out of his brother room upstairs).  Finally a brief chance to sit down, drink tea and blog read and write.

* yesterday toddler climbed up grabbed fish food and dumped it in the tank and on floor.  I skimmed the tank completely and cleaned floor.  The water was still very cloudy so I was hopeful.

This was in a span of 2 hours and I sure I left some things out.  I’ve only been up for 2 hours.  I feel like I am riding on crazy.  Doesn’t help that I too binged the last 2 days, TOM came yesterday with a wallop and my weight is way up.  I have a mountain of clothes to fold, fish tank to clean, dirty house, etc all while trying to keep the kids happy and sane.  I never feel the “going fine” in my life.  I know this is a season in my life (having a toddler) and it too will pass.  But seriously!

I have to find the “going fine” in my life or find another way to deal with the chaos.  What about you?

Add on – Just go a call from my trainer, calling me out.  I missed a few days this week.  No more excuses.  Back on.  4 weeks of consistency.  Calories on track., exercise on, head right.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

The Ugly Truth - repost

It’s repost Saturday.  This is a fun one.  My before pics.  Granted this is after about a 15 pound drop from my heaviest in 2007.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

So here it is. I am putting it all out there. A bit scary but accountability is good! I am not sucking in or pushing out my tummy, just a neutral position. The water bottle is for perspective. I HATE the side view but it is my reality. I am like humpty dumpty, big egg on top of bird legs.



Today is good. I was hungry in the middle of the night with the 4 am baby wake up. I went for an hour hike with a neighbor. Huffed and puffed up a few hills but kept a good pace. Food is under control. No Yoga, hubby was sick and slept in.
P.S. Pictures were taken 1/12/10 at 214 pounds on my 5'4" frame. Can you imagine an extra 18 on there, that was around May of 2008

Friday, June 10, 2011

5? Friday 6/10

th_w6r0jk

1. How close to your childhood dreams is your life now?
This is a heavy one.  To be honest I don’t remember what my childhood dreams were.  When I was a young adult I knew it was important to me to be home with my kids, and here I am.  Yes, I have a chemistry degree, yes I used it for about 10 years.  Will I use it again?  don’t know!

2. What is one must have item for the summer?
Sunscreen, we are all fair.  I hate putting it on.  My routine for the boys is start at home, use cream, then spray and zinc stick on face.  Spray and zinc stick while at beach, pool, etc.

3. Do you have your kids stay up on school stuff during summer vacation? (Or, if you don't have kiddos, did your parents make you keep up on school stuff during summer?)
My oldest just finished first grade.  I have a full plan for his this summer (first time).  I was in camp most of my summers when I was kid.  I don’t remember doing work.

This is touchy for me.  I’ve been feeling like I failed him in the past and I want to make up for it.  Work with him more.

4. Do you can or freeze fresh produce?
Funny you ask.  With a hopefully fruitful garden this summer I want to learn how to store my produce (can or freeze).  I have frozen bananas, thats about it so far.  Any tips or tricks welcome, especially with tomatoes, we have 6 huge plants.

5. Do you get ready for the day first thing in the morning?
This is a confusing one.  Does it mean do I shower and do it all first thing out of bed or something else?  If that's the case, then no.  My usual MO is throw some clothes on, pull back hair, remove night guard and head downstairs with glasses on.  At some point I will go back up and wash, contacts, brush, maybe shower, and dress for the next thing (kid drop off, exercise class, etc).  If its an early morning “thing” then yes, I do everything before I head downstairs (if the tyrants kids allow), food (maybe) then out the door.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

That was Hard Work

Today I went to my first Gentle Restorative Yoga class.  I knew this wouldn’t be like my regular sweat inducing yoga class.  But seriously.

Description:
A relaxing class designed for rejuvenation and treating fatigue; perinatal mothers; recuperation from injuries and senior citizens with limited mobility. Beginning with a few minutes of gentle movements and stretching to ease restlessness in the mind and prepare the body for relaxation. Restorative postures, soothing and well-supported by blankets, blocks, or other props follow, held for several minutes at a time allowing for chronic tension to be released.

It was “hard work” but not that type of “work”.  You have to focus on your breathing and keep your mind focused.  The second my mind started heading into the “To Do’s” my breathing became shallow.  My mantra was “I am present”.  It was so hard not to let my mind wander into work mode.  I don’t think I’ve ever spent an hour staying present in the moment with focus.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 6/7/11

Weight = 190.0
Loss = –1.6

Finally the right direction.  Next week, back in the 180’s, never ever to return to the 190’s again.

Body and mind have been adjusting to the new workout schedule.  The timing is different and the intensity is higher.  I was plum tired last week.  Hubby even commented he “hates” when I am tired, I guess I get a bit snappy or let’s just be honest BITCHY.  Last night I did double kettlebell swings and squats.  That would be squatting, all the way down, with 52 pounds in my arms.  OUCH !!!!!!!!

I’ve fully tracked my food for the last 4 days and surprise surprise, I am eating more than I thought.  Yesterday was the lowest at 1450 calories and 158g of carbs.  Been having a hard time controlling the chocolate covered almonds in the house.  YUMMY.

I am enjoying working on my house and having the free time to do so.  The list is long a tedious but its moving.  I have a whole post planned that is dedicated to my space. 

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Would You Judge?

The other day Lyn from Escape from Obesity posed a great question seeking honest answers.  I wanted to repost it here and give you my response.

What do you think... what do you *honestly* think... when you see a very obese mother with her very obese young child? What do you think? Do you make any assumptions? How do you feel towards the mother? Towards the child?

What if they are at a buffet eating loads of fried chicken and French fries, or at McDonald's having Big Macs? What if they are walking briskly on a path together? What if they are eating a salad together?

Does any of that change your thoughts or feelings?

This was a hot button post.  The comments were all over and very honest.  Some think obesity is genetic, i don’t.  Others mentioned how you don’t know what the mental issues are and they maybe a major factor in the obesity. This is my 2 cents.  Please be open to my honesty and don’t judge me.  Not that you would :-)

This is a tough one for sure. Judging an obese person is an accepted form of discrimination, probably one of the last. We have no right and should never judge someone on the color of their skin so why is ok to do so with weight and lifestyle choice. Yes, being overweight is 90% choice (mental or physical) and 10% genetic. Yes, you can gain weight from an injury but you still can control your eating and adjust the amount based on how you can move. Mental illness can affect your weight but you still have a choice to seek treatment. That being said doesn’t mean I am above it all.

Now 40 pounds less I think I have less tolerance than before. You have a choice. No, that choice is not just about food, mental plays a big part. But, there is still choice there. You can choose to work on the mental aspects of why you make your lifestyle choices. I am fat, my 2 kids and hubby are not. When I see obese families it makes me so sad. I can’t imagine the hurdles those kids face. Especially when they decide to become healthy (maybe as an adult). I think regardless of the situation I honestly would be judgmental (in my head only) but yes more so in the buffet situation. The statics are staggering. If one parent is obese the child has a 50% chance of becoming obese. If both parents are then, it jumps to 80%. Something needs to happen or it will get far worse.

I also believe education, income and availability of healthy food choices plays a big factor. When you can get a double cheeseburger at the mc arches for $1.49 where is the motivation to go home and cook your own meal? It is hard work fixing yourself.

(added to this post) Is obesity genetic?  My answer is yes and no.  You can be pre-deposed to genetic conditions that are linked to obesity, like diabetes.  In my case I was genetically gifted with PCOS.  That means I have an apple shape, major belly fat, insulin resistant, high triglycerides and sensitivity to carbs among other things.  It also means I have a far greater chance of being diabetic.  Does that mean I have to be obese or diabetic?  NO.  I just have a harder time losing weight but I still have a CHOICE.  I fight that CHOICE every day.  I work every second.  I may not always be on the right side of “my choice” but it’s still my choice.

Please add you honest thoughts?

Saturday, June 4, 2011

My W.I.D.T.H

Jack Sh*t posts his W.I.D.T.H pics on Saturday so I thought i would repost mine.  Original post was 5/30/2010, just about a year ago.  Still stands to this day but I do think my chin and neck look better now.

Jack Sh*T at http://jackfit.blogspot.com/ asked readers to write on a note card their "Why I Do This Here".  Here is mine.

In case you can't read it, it says "So that my mind, body, heart, hopes and dreams are all in sync ... P.S.  No more man belly".

Friday, June 3, 2011

5? Friday 6/3

th_w6r0jk

1. If you had to choose, how would you prefer to choose to spend money...on landscaping or a pool?
Sure a pool would be nice.  I love water and so do my kids.  It would take up our whole yard.  But the after costs are the problem.  The cleaning and electricity to heat the pool.  Way too high.  So I would have to go with landscaping and hardscaping.

2. Death penalty, yay or nay?
I have zero issues with the death penalty.  In fact I think it takes way too long and the appeal process is ridiculous.  I think we are way to soft on our criminals.  The recidivism rate is insane.

3. What's the worst thing your kid has gotten into when you turned your back/blogged/showered/blinked?
My 2 year old’s nickname is El Diablo for a reason.  The worst could be going out front door and crossing the street in a diaper.  Luckily my neighbor is a friend and caught him.  Bad mommy award here.

4. How often do you REALLY go to the dentist?
Everyone in the family is every 6 months.  No fears or issues with it.  Just a general dislike.

5. What is your favorite animal (doesn't have to be a pet-type animal)?
I really have an issue picking favorites.  I do love lions.  You can see their soul in their eyes.  Gorillas too.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Sticky Observation

I noticed something when I am cooking.

Cooked pasta – sticky
cooked white rice – super sticky
Cooked brown rice – not as sticky
Cooked potatoes – super sticky, try cutting them. Stickiness all over
Cooked egg – not sticky
Raw eggs – not sticky
Bread dough – definition of sticky
Waffle mix – gooey, sticky
Meat – not sticky
Veggies – not sticky

What is all the stickiness doing to my inside, my arteries. I can just imagine it sticking right in there. There is something to this whole “low carb” and right carb thing. I can also image that sticky potato sticking right to my tummy.

Try this at home. Look at the texture of the foods you are eating. Then imagine what they are doing inside of you.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

June Goals

185, 185, 185, 185

I want to get back down to my lowest weight.  Simple right?

How?  I mentioned my exercise plan yesterday.  Food is the problem, always has been.  I will track my food daily.  This week I will bring the calories to 1500 or less.  Next week at about 1300.  I will add more veggies and fruits, hopefully our garden will be fruitful soon.  It looks great.  I will drink my water (72 oz or more).  I’ve been slacking on the water big time.

Shouldn’t be any major roadblocks.  July will be a different story.

Do you have goals for June?