Saturday, January 29, 2011

Evil Plans

My pain in the ass hubby lost like 3 pounds since our Tuesday weigh in.  We both were 187.6 on Tuesday.  He has been sick with no appetite.  Thursday he was bad.  In the am he said “I lost a pound since I haven’t been eating”.  An hour later, “I lost another pound” said after his throne visit.

But oh, I have some plans for him.  Today is the first day of Girl Scout cookie sales.  I have a least 3 little cuties I committed to buying from.  I am not a not a huge fan of the GS cookies.  I do like the Peanut butter sandwiches, so I am only buying 1 box of those.  But hubby on the other hand could eat a whole box of the Caramel delites in one sitting.  I ordered 6 boxes of those.  The 7 y.o. loves them too.


On the other hand I love the stinker.  A few weeks ago I bought Rocco DiSpirto’s new book “Now Eat This”.  Rocco DiSpirito transforms America's favorite comfort foods into deliciously healthy dishes-all with zero bad carbs, zero bad fats, zero sugar, and maximum flavor.  Most recipes are 250 calories or less.  Hubby made 4 recipes out of the book and bought ingredients for a few more.  This from a man who rarely cooks and never follows a recipe.

We tried the eggplant manicotti (yummy), Chicken Piccata (good), Cream of Mushroom soup (ok) and the brownies (yuck).  The brownies are made with black beans and cocoa.  They are way too rich and dense for me.  Kids didn’t go for them either.  The brownies are 56 cal per serving. 

My evil plans are in jest.  I love having a willing heath partner.  We would have ordered the cookies anyway.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

What am I Holding On To?

What am I holding on to?  The question was posed to me Tuesday night by my KettleBell guru PAD.  He posed the question to me after I mentioned that hubby and I weight exactly the same.  I mean exactly to the tenth of a pound.

My first reaction was confrontational.  My head said I am not holding on to anything.  I have been working my ass off.  After a few minutes I thought, wait.  What am I holding on to?  I need to think about this.  Honestly in 2 days I haven’t come up with an answer, but in all honestly I really haven’t had time to think.

I have issue with success.  When success occurs, sabotage comes into play.

He asked “Was I doing everything it takes”.  Um, well not everything.  I still put sugar in my am tea (only).  I still eat bread.  I am not willing to get rid of bread.  I eat very little but I haven’t gone 100% no bread.  I need to work on the veggies.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 1/25/11

Weight = 187.6
Loss = –0.6

I’ll take it.  Considering I didn’t exercise for a week, I was sick and I had a visitor, a loss is a great thing.  I am officially saying goodbye to the 190’s.  I will never see you again.

My weekly average performance with the BodyMedia FIT system.


So far I am still in the honeymoon phase with the BodyMedia.  I didn’t wear it at night the last 2 nights.  I wanted a break while I was sleeping.  So far no complaints.  The food logging is super easy.  Way easier than Spark People.  I would like to see a place to write notes, or maybe I haven’t found it yet.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

An Indirect Success Story

The other day I had an awesome “conversation” with my cousin on Facebook.  Unfortunately we have been separated by time and distance.  This past October on my NY / PA trip we had a brief chance to reconnect.  My Cuz is blessed with the same apple shape, big belly, diabetes prone genetics that I am.

I was amazed. She told me about her nearly 30 pound weight loss since October. One of her motivations was a picture taken during our visit.   She made some drastic diet changes, no white crap, no flour, sugar, etc add in the whole grains.  She is a busy women with a full time job, 3 teen boys and 1 pre-teen girl.

She is brave.  She doesn't use a scale.  Her Dr visits is the only time she steps on the scale. Otherwise she does her measurements.  I love her trick of cutting off the tape measure from her widest measurement.  A “will never go back there” reminder.  She has lost a ton of inches. I am not that brave.  I need my scale.  I don’t think I can eliminate the scale for a few reasons.
  • My diet change is not drastic.  The changes I make are very minor.  A few less carbs here or a few less calories there.  I have been making changes for 5 years.
  • My vices are far a few between.  I drink only tea and water.  I almost never have sweets or bad for me crunchy stuff.  Fast food is super rare.  We, as a family, only eat outside of the house maybe 2 times a month.  I am constantly home and “in control’ of my food environment.  Most days I eat 3 meals and my snacks at home.
  • I don’t trust myself without a scale.  I know my body pretty well but I want to drop weight.  I don’t think the inches will tell enough of the story.  I have nearly 50 pounds to go before I hit “Normal” BMI.  The weight has to drop too.
I am proud of the fact that my cuz mentioned my blog was a source for her.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Down and Out

I hate being sick.  I hate how much it derails my life.  The baby has an ear infection so that makes it double the fun.  This time I really requested hubby’s help.  Not that he doesn’t help anyway.  This time I was specific.  I need you to do XXX.  It helped keep the general household chaos on the same track.

Friday I thought I was doing better.  Ran some errands.  Pass out of couch for about 2 hours.  Thank you hubby.  Ran a few more small errands.  Later in the day I wanted to do something cardio so I did 4 full version dances on Just Dance for the wii.  A few hours later I was beat down and the congestion in my chest elevated. 

I want to feel better so I can get back on track.

I tried to take a nap today but it didn’t happen.  I will rest of the couch, drink my water and take it easy.  I have plans to exercise on Sunday morning.

To top it off I think my visitor is coming now, 4 fricken days early.  Really!  What else do you want to add to the mix.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Body Media Update

I am sick.  Wednesday the sick baby and I spent the whole day on the couch.  Seriously I haven’t watched so much TV in ages.  I wore my Body Media Monitor all day.  I figured it would show my absolute minimum calorie burn since I did absolutely nothing all day.  Here is the results for the 24 hour period.1-18

So my nearly absolute min calorie burn is about 2000.  I am surprised it is so high.  You can see my line during the day was about as flat as me sleeping.  For comparisons sake, here is Monday (sledding and k-bell).1-17a

Big difference.  The jury not out yet on my opinion of the monitor.  I have some issues I still want to test out.  Below is my physical activity for the day.  Again, nearly nothing.    

1-18aToday I will work on getting better.  Thinking about exercise.  If I am fever free I might do something.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 1/18/10 – Happy Dance Day

Weight = 188.2
Loss = –3.4

FINALLY.  On Monday I checked the scale and it was 190.0.  It didn’t dip into the 180’s.  I never seen it dip into the 180s.  Until today.  I was amazed.  There is a few things that made today a success.  Two of those things happened yesterday.  On a mini road trip, with a friend and her 2 kids, to the snow I hiked my butt in knee deep hard pack snow, sledded and hike back up the steep hill carrying the toddler.  On the trip home the kids wanted McDonalds.  On the way to McDees I made sure I ate my pre packed sandwich and pop chips.  Once we reached the fat arches I didn't want anything.  I ordered nothing even though the 5 other car occupants did.  I also hauled my tired cranky butt to K-Bell class last night.  I didn’t sabotage my success.  I prepared for the road trip by loading my cooler with good stuff.

Oh course this journey also has to be an uphill battle for me.  Last night the toddler and I came down with a cold.  I feel like crap.  Next week is my hormone week.  I want to and will hold on to the 180’s with everything I got but it will be an uphill battle.

I am also 0.2 pounds LESS than my hubby.  I want to stay below him.  I will fight for that one too.

The calorie monitor is cool.  More later.


Sunday, January 16, 2011

Trying Something New

For months I have been on the fence about buying a heart rate or activity monitor.  I love the idea of the activity monitor and seeing your total calories burned.  But on the other hand I want to see my heart rate during vigorous exercise and if I was a runner, it would be nice to see the distance, etc.  I don’t think there is a device that does both.  I also dislike having to pay a online subscription to use the activity monitors.

In comes Costco today.

My love of everything Costco is wide and deep.  Today while shopping and dragging both kids I discovered something. Side rant -  I hate going to Costco on the weekends but it was a must.  I happened to go into a side aisle, while leaving kiddos at the end, with some exercise stuff it it.  Low and behold there was a display for a Garmin heart rate monitor and the Body Media Fit monitor.  The Body Media Fit monitor happen to have a $50 instant rebate on it bringing the price to about $149.  The package also includes 12 months of the online program.

So …..

I bought it.  I am sitting here waiting for the thing to charge up so I can put it on and go to bed.  It also monitors your sleep behavior.  I figured since I was already committed to tracking my calories to get some weight off me, I might as well see what I am burning.

Stay tuned for more.  Do you have a fitness monitor?  Thoughts!

Friday, January 14, 2011

Baby Steps

Today my MOPS group listened to a guest speaker on the Dr. Sears LEAN program.  The concept is great, the speaker not so much.  Basically the program is Lifestyle (L), Exercise (E), Attitude (A) and Nutrition (N).  Is is geared toward parents but the concepts are universal.

The problem was that many of the moms felt overwhelmed or felt like “I am killing my kids because I give them XXX”.  Change is slow.  Very slow.  Even though I have been on a steady weigh loss journey for the past year, I have been changing my eating habits for nearly 5 years.  Baby steps. 

I started with dropping diet drinks.  Then I removed artificial sweeteners out of my life.  This wasn’t for diet reasons, more so for chemical reasons.  Then I removed HFCS.  Reading labels closer also came into play.   I was slowly adopting a cleaner, whole foods lifestyle.  And guess what I am still not there yet.

I tried to convey the baby step concept to some of the moms.  I also feel that we (as parents) don’t have to go 100% no sugar, all whole, all clean.  Some may disagree with me but I believe in moderation.  It took me years to moderate my portion control and clean the plate issues.  Being able to moderate sweets and the “bad stuff” is more important than 100% denial.  I am not sure the 100% denial is teaching anything.  If you kids goes to a party and has cake you can use it as a teaching moment.  Cake is fine once in a blue moon but this why we don’t want to eat too much.

With my kids, there is so many food issue but there is one area I feel I can pat myself on the back.  Pre kids I made it clear to hubby we will NOT instill a clean your plate mentality.  Now, I observe my 7yo get a piece of cake, take a few bites and then leave it.  I don’t think I could do that, yet.  I feel he intuitivly learned to listen to his body.  He knows when he is full.  Something that took me years to re-learn.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Where Do I Fit?

I have always had issues with knowing where I fit.  Where I fit on the fat scale?  At my heaviest I know I thought I was smaller than I was.  At 230 pounds I thought I was just a tad overweight but still fit.  Who the hell was I fooling, oh ya ME. 

Now I am fitter.  Still have a ways to go on the scale but my body is different.  I don’t know where I fit.  I look at others and think “do I look like her or her”.  I am not judging.  I am just trying to get my head and reality to sync.

I have no problem with mirrors.  TMI – I stand in front of our wall length closet mirrors daily, naked and observe.  Sometime pinch the wobbly parts.

Still I can’t figure what I look like.  Am I still huge and obese looking.  You know big and puffy.  I know my face has changed but still.  Where am I.

I don’t want to fool myself into thinking I look better than reality.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Weekly Weigh In 1/11/11

Weight = 191.6
Loss = –1.0

Considering at sometime between 12/31/10 and today there was a 195 on the scale, 191 is excellent.  I figure, if I keep on track I WILL get below 190.  Sure I initially expected a lower eight but on evaluation, I know this is about right.

I have been tracking the food.  My carbs are actually higher than I would like.  This week I am going to work on 150 or less.
food log
Found another thing I DON’T like about tracking my food.  I could be having a great food day.  My total cals come in around 1200 (my Min) and then I decide, oh I have more room so why don’t I eat XXX.  If I wasn’t tracking I wouldn’t have added the extra food.  Gotta break that mentality.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Blogversary 1-10

Today is my one year Blogversary.  This is my 218th post about my journey to a fitter, better me.

I can’t believe the world I stumbled upon.

I am amazed I had so much to say and still do for the matter.

This tool is one of the number one reason I have succeeded so far and have not dropped back into old ways (weights).

A look back at my first post, my “why”.

I am so tired today that I can’t come up with anything to write.  I did a kick butt K-bell class on Saturday and took a semi break yesterday.  I am still sore.  Yesterday was an afternoon at Disneyland with a ton of walking.  I am having some problems with my hands going numb all the time.  I believe the cause is from all the muscle tension in my shoulders.  I am working it out and it is slowly getting better.  I plan to do K-bells tonight but I am going to take it slightly easier.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Support System Part 2

Part 1 of of my support system is here.

My Forces of Nature
My kids support me.  Weird for a mom of 2 young kids to say this.  They support me by being great kids, especially when hubby and I go to kettlebell class together or when I need to exercise with them around.

My belly sister.  We have the same body type.  You have done an amazing job dropping 60 pounds.  I love talking shop with you.  Can’t wait to do some serious shopping with you (no kids) when we are both post SX someday.  Our blossoming friendship means a lot to me.

Friends and Followers
I don’t have many followers but knowing they are out there in the cyber world following me helps me in ways I can’t even put into words.  I also know there is some friends out there who read my blog but aren’t counted in my followers number.  It tickles my heart when a friend comes up to me and mentions they read my blog.   I wish I was more eloquent in expressing how much it means to me to have people out there reading my blog.  I receive so many insightful comments.  You guys ROCK.  The support is tremendous regardless if I hear from you or not (no comments, etc).  I strive to maintain your interest in reading my little blog.

The occasional family member with a positive comment.  Seeing someone who hasn’t seem me in some time.  A comment from a fellow mommy.  Etc, etc.  I will honest here – I love positive, thoughtful, meaningful comments.  Although I do sometimes get shy from the attention.  I am a Gemini – 2 sided – desire and love compliments but at same time feel shy and awkward.  I try my best not to write them off.  For example saying something like ”thank you but I still have a long way to go”.  Adding the negative negates the nice comment. 

Who is your support system?

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Support System Part 1

Everyone needs a support system.  Especially in a time of change.  A time where you are transforming yourself inside and out.  As I approach my one year blogging anniversary, I want to take this moment to thank my support system.  Without it I would not have come this far.

You are my ROCK and my challenge.  You challenge me by knowing me better than I know myself at times.  The number one way you support me is by giving me the freedom of time to exercise, food track, menu plan and blog.  Other times it is your keen observations on my behavior that I am usually not aware of.  You never complain about what I cook or stock the house with.  I have the freedom to explore new options with food and exercise, etc.  I am thrilled of our commitment to Paul and the Kettlebells   I am so happy to see you on the same track with me right now.  I envision a future where exercise and nutrition are part of our marriage.  A part that we can’t be without.

Paul Daniels
Its only been a month of Kettlebells and Cardio Kickboxing but I have learned so much from you.  You are an excellent trainer with a keen eye for form.  Sometimes I curse you in my head during class :-).  The Kettlebells have done amazing things to my body.  I thank you for the information and training you have provided.  I look forward to the next 5 months and then some.

Cyndy – My Unofficial Personal Trainer
You are an inspiration, you have transformed your body thru hard ass work.  You provide information and tools to me constantly.  We both have some crappy metabolic issues that only we can understand together.  You knowledge has assisted me immensely throughout this year.  Thank you for giving me your time which I know is a precious resource for you.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Ah Ha Moment

I had two Ah Ha Moments yesterday.

I was looking thru a newsletter from my Mom’s club.  There was a page with pictures from our holiday party.  At first, I didn't recognize myself in one of the pictures.  It was weird to see myself and for a brief moment not recognize me.  Have I really changed that much?  Or, is it that I still feel like the 230 pound girl?

Today is 94 days to my Anniversary.  My second Ah Ha moment came from a comment yesterday on my Anniversary party goal.  Karen has been a wise advisor and personally knows the issues I have with goal setting, based on her own struggle with the same.

Karen said... ……My honest opinion, since you asked us, is that you should set behavioral goals and then let the weight follow. Like: amount of exercise or calories or days on plan or whatever. We can only control ourselves and never that darn fickle scale.

For some reason I never thought about achieving a desired weight by setting behavior goals.  Don’t know why I didn’t put 2 and 2 together.  So, I am going to set some behavior goals and hopefully the weight will follow.  If it’s not exactly 175,  I know by doing the following, I did my best.

For the next 94 days I will:

  1. Drink 72 to 96 oz water. 
  2. Log food and track calories
  3. Daily calorie range not to exceed 1700 on 95% of the days.  So that gives me 5 “free” days.  That doesn’t equal out of control, just a bit of freedom to exceed my calorie max.
  4. Exercise plan* – Mon – K-Bell, Tue – K-Bell, Wed – Yoga or off, Thu – K-Bell, Fri – Off or Yoga (switch w/ Wed),  Sat – Open exercise, Sun – Cardio kick.  I will add in Cardio Kick classes after Kettlebell Class when I can.  Back to back for 2 hrs is hard.
  5. Take all my vitamins and medicine daily and at the correct time.
  6. Sleep

My behavior goals are barring any major illness or event.  *Modifications to exercise can be made.  If I can’t make a class I will get on my treadmill for at least 45 min and maybe do some Wii fit or hike (Open day).

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Fierce, Fit and Fabulous

Last night I watched the show “I Used to be Fat” on MTV.  In 111 days this teen lost an incredible amount of weight.  The show was great.  I love the quote, she wants to be “Fierce, Fit and Fabulous”.  Sound about right to me.  Thanks Chubby McGee for the 411.

So, 95 days from today is my 10th anniversary party.  We are having a cocktail party on the same boat we got married on.  I want to rock the boat with my new looks. image0000422A

Not the best picture, but you get the idea.

Dare I set a goal for the big date?  I have done so well crappy with weight goals this past year.

I like the idea of 175.  It is reasonable, with a steel focus on my food. 175 is about a 2 pounds per week loss with some wiggle room.  As I wrote this I changed the weight goal 2 times from 165 to 175, I want to make this goal so I don’t want to set it out of my reach.

Honestly I haven’t even thought about what I want to wear.  I might wear my wedding dress – altered to a cocktail length dress.  I am 10 pounds LIGHTER than when I got married in 2001.  I guess I have to start investigating.

What do you think.  Considering my record with goals, do I forgo setting one?

Monday, January 3, 2011

Gotta Fix My Pie

This weight loss / health journey is like a pie.  No, not a juicy apple pie.  I figure 1/3 is exercise, then mental, then food.  Some will say to drop weight it is 80% food, 10% exercise and 10% genetic.  That doesn’t account for the mental aspect.  Talk to anyone who kept off a significant amount of weight, if you don’t fix the mental, you won’t succeed.


I have been kicking ass in the exercise department.  This was my last week.
Mon – Kettle bell 45 min, kickboxing 1hr
Tue – K – Bell
Wed – Vinasa flow Yoga – not a stretch class
Thu – K-Bell
Fri – off
Sat – kick boxing on New Years day
Sun – Kick boxing


It was clear in December my calories are way too high.  Then I decided to eat CRAP the last 3 days (12/31 – 1/2).  No calories counting, free eating.  Out of control.  60% of my pie is out of whack.  DONE now.  Move on and correct the issues.

I decided on a short term goal for January.  I will be under 190 by the end of January.  Enough of this.